The Roles and Responsibilities of the Wedding Party
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Whether you’re taking a nontraditional approach or sticking with tradition, your wedding party can be an invaluable help in the planning process and on the big day. They take on a variety of different roles, from helping usher guests to seating them and standing beside you during the ceremony.
The maid of honor (or matron of honor if the bride is already married) is head of the bridal party and helps with planning. She may also host showers and a bachelorette party, and give a speech at the reception.
Bridesmaids
Being asked to be a bridesmaid is an incredibly special honor, but it also comes with a lot of responsibility. Wedding and events pro Jane Yu shares a list of bridesmaid duties to keep in mind before, during and after the big day.
Attend dress fittings (the bride may give you guidelines but will usually let you choose your own style).
Help the bride navigate doorways, up and down any steps or into her car on her big day. Also, be on hand to lift her gown for pee duty when necessary.
Offer support and encouragement during the wedding planning process, especially if things get stressful. Be her sounding board and help her brainstorm ideas (but don’t be pushy). She’ll appreciate your honest opinions.
Groomsmen
Groomsmen are usually close friends or brothers that the groom has chosen to offer him moral support on his big day. They should also help with wedding planning, attend the bachelor party and wedding rehearsal and wear coordinating formal attire.
They should be able to greet guests as they arrive at the ceremony site and lead them to their seats. They can also be a helpful resource if the couple has designated spots where wedding gifts are to be placed.
During the reception, groomsmen should escort bridesmaids down the aisle and into their cars or limos (unless they have children) as well as participate in guest-related activities like signing the guest book and visiting the photo booth. They may also give a toast or dance with the bride and groom if they choose.
Maid of Honor
The bride will rely on her maid of honor (or matron of honor) for a wide range of tasks and responsibilities, including planning memorable pre-wedding celebrations like bridal showers and bachelorette parties. She may also look to her MOH for guidance or differing opinions when making important wedding-related decisions.
On the day of her wedding, it’s the maid of honor’s job to review the schedule of events with the rest of the bridesmaids and ensure they are where they need to be at the appropriate time. This is especially helpful in the chaotic hours before the ceremony when last-minute errands like picking up the marriage license are often required.
If the bride has a gift table, it’s the MOH’s responsibility to help guests with their gifts and to record who gave what so that the bride can write thank-you notes later on. The MOH is also traditionally seated at the head of the top table with the groom, his parents and the best man.
Best Man
A best man is the groom’s right hand throughout the planning process and wedding day. He’s typically in charge of the bachelor party and a point of contact for everyone on the groom’s side.
He usually gushs during his speech about the bride and reads any telegrams or messages he has gathered for the couple before the wedding day. He may also decorate the getaway car if needed.
It’s customary for the best man to sign as one of two witnesses when the couple signs their marriage license. He also stows away the wedding rings and welcomes guests at the reception. He may give a toast after the maid of honor and/or father-of-the-bride. He’s also in charge of handling transportation for the newlyweds to their honeymoon, whether that’s driving them or arranging for a limo or bus.
Ushers
Ushers are a great way to get teenage cousins and close friends involved in your wedding ceremony without the commitment of being bridesmaids or groomsmen. These guys and girls generally wear suits and ties that coordinate with your wedding colors.
Ushers greet and seat guests before the ceremony begins and can help people find their seats if they are lost or confused. They often escort elderly family members, such as grandparents, to their seats. They may also hand out programs and roll out the aisle runner (if you are using one).
Luxury wedding and event planner Kristin Banta, who has 17 years of experience and appears weekly as a wedding expert on Hallmark Channel’s Home & Family, suggests that the best ushers are “friendly, gregarious, and helpful.” They should take initiative and be able to handle problems or questions as they arise.
